18 July 2010: In and Out of Bed with Zsa Zsa Gabor

Before Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan, celebrities who are celebrated for doing nothing well or worthwhile except to promote themselves as celebrities, there was Hungarian-born Zsa Zsa Gabor, former beauty queen, socialite and occasional actress who starred in such howlers as Queen of Outer Space and Won Ton Ton, the Dog Who Saved Hollywood. There’s…

2 July 2010: Loose Lips Sink Ships!

According to The Washington Post, U.S. Marines are being warned to be wary of foreign beauties they might meet and mate while they are on shore leave in the Seychelles islands.  Pictures of Anna Chapman, the ravishing redhead who has been arrested recently as a Russian spy, are being circulated among the 3,000 sex-starved marines who have now been…

27 June 2010: “Not tonight, Josephine!”

If men with erectile dysfunction can reach for Viagra and/or Cialis to make sure they’re “ready when the moment is right,”  it’s only fair that women with libido difficulties should have a remedy of their own.  According to an article in The New York Times, relief is just around the corner.  Right now, the F.D.A.…

25 June 2010: Wake Up, Little Sushi!

Scientists at Ocean Alliance, a research and conservation group, recently released a report which shows that “sperm whales feeding even in the most remote reaches of Earth’s oceans have built up stunningly high levels of toxic and heavy metals  like cadmium, aluminum, chromium, lead, silver, mercury and titanium.”  Industry dumps these things into the oceans,…

23 June 2010: The Place For Criminals

I’m hooked on MSNBC, which bills itself as “The Place For Politics.”  But why is it that, whenever HARDBALL with Chris Matthews, COUNTDOWN with Keith Olbermann or THE RACHEL MADDOW SHOW aren’t on the air after 10 PM at night, or on weekends, the programming inadvertently turns to something called LOCKUP, a prison documentary about hardened criminals?  Is this a portent…

19 June 2010: Women Beware Women!

It boggles my mind how, in recent years at the University of Kansas, so many of the young women in my classes do not want to be identified as feminists.  They seem to want all the benefits, and actually take all the benefits for granted, but would rather not be identified with the cause, or…

17 June 2010: Big Porno?

Now that BP has made Big Promises to make Big Payments (industry experts say the $20 billion in escrow will grow to $65 billion by the time this is all over), and now that BP has also provided some unintended comic relief by allowing Big People to laugh at the expense of “small people,” we all need to start filling up our…

26 May 2010: “Plug the damn hole!”

Says President Obama to BP. Says the rabbit to the tree after Alice fell into Wonderland. Says American cheese to Swiss cheese. Says the flat tire to the garage mechanic. Says the IRS to all the loopy tax laws. Says the dike to the little Dutch boy. Says the wounded gunman to the Mafia medic.…